Wednesday 24 February 2016

Hibernating Blogger Comeback

I feel dumb and mute for a moment when i write this post, being guilty at the most and making useless excuses to myself for not being able to provide air of literature to my blog for these long months.

My last post was on August 2015 and i went on an hibernating excuse for 5  months. But one thing kept me very busy for sure, the most important task of every student when they complete their degree, especially the Bhutanese .i.e. RCSE.
From the 1st day of your school where you shit on your shorts for being too afraid to ask your teacher for a recess grant, the time where you get thrashed hard on the palm from your Dzongkha Lopen for spelling wrong, your Geography madam rolling the floor globes to explain the concept of day and night, brain wracking theories and derivations of Physics and one question of differentiation and integration of maths covering up whole of you long notebook, getting a cross remark from your strict teacher; till the time where you walk carrying thick textbooks appearing to be a medical student for 4 long years in college. The journey of learning ABC to the knowledge of current profession, the fate of almost all Bhutanese student is all sealed upon on one exam, RCSE. High expectations from your parents push oneself to give their best because all your parents want is our secure future and RCSE gives you that. I too saw my parents sweat all those years to give me the best education possible and if i could see tears of happiness when i make it through, then i wouldn't have wanted anything else.

By God's grace and through my own determination, i broke through that barrier and nothing could give me joy more than seeing ocean of happiness in their eyes on 9th of December. I couldn't resist but scribble a long paragraph of gratitude to all those who helped me through the journey of that success and especially to my beloved parents.  

I desperately wanted to get placed in the capital for my parents were there but guess what! I didn't. I put faith in god consoling myself for i believe, "whatever happens, it happens for a good" and kick started my journey towards the eastern Bhutan. I grew up playing in the dusty sands of Thimphu and now, i knew my career adulthood was fixed in Mongar. Everything has a reason and i hope there is a big chunk of reason for i was flown  farthest away from west to extreme east. "Impermanence", once again stroke my mind when i had to wave good bye to my family and relative. A huge challenge lay ahead of me. I was moving into a place where i knew no one, i had no relative, nor friends and i am still struggling to fit myself in.

It had been the longest one month of my life.With some connection from my relative and a friend, i managed a small one room quarter. I had my Father accompanied for one week and setting myself well, i had to see him off as well. After that, the only sound i could hear in my home was my own breath. I would doze off time to time only to wake up and stare at the blank wall. I used to take a stroll around Mongar town and would be back home withing 30 minutes, yes! that was the size of the town.

 I understand that everything takes time and i am sure, i will feel better. I already started to feel so. I am removing every bits of opportunity for the crazy mind to wander around. Many a times, i have heard and read about the challenges people face during their first time venture into a journey unknown and i know, the time has knocked on my door now. Before at home, i didn't have to bother if the sugar bottle was getting empty nor i had to worry if the rice was finishing but now, as the month ends, i see myself getting concerned for those things that usually my parents did. I am learning to be independent and i see myself growing mentally in terms of handling the real life situations.



Well, i thought to cover up with few excuses(hehe) why my blog was lost but landed up writing about my first time experience into the new phase of my life. But, i think all those in my thoughts hooked me and seized my hands for a very long moment. I will not dissappoint myself or others anymore and keep the update for i got lots of things to write and share about. So, please keep visiting my blog.